Change in Relationships
As for Southern Californians there has been a huge change in weather this week, and I am super hyped about it. However, I want to talk about a change I wasn’t as excited about. I have written before about change in seasons, but this time I want to focus on the change in season in (all) relationships.
If you tried to keep summer all year long could you do it? You could try. You could wear shorts when it is 60 degrees, or go swimming when it’s raining, or drink lemonade while sitting outside under an umbrella. But, you couldn’t actually change the weather. You could only change how you adapt to it. You couldn’t make it sunny, and 100 degrees or keep it from raining. Sometimes we try and hold onto things that have already passed. Whether you believe it or not there are actually seasons in Southern California. They look different, but there is still a change in weather, and environment. Seasons don’t stay the same, they change, evolve, and come back around. But they weren't meant to stay forever. This is the same in relationships. If you tried to keep the same friendship or relationship when it’s season is different, it’s like trying to wear shorts in the winter. You could try, but it won’t be the same. Why? It wasn’t meant to. Summer wasn’t meant to last forever, same with Winter, Spring, and Fall. They are beautifully different. Each season brings something special to your life.
I am going through this right now. I have friendships that look a lot different in this season, then they did in the previous seasons. I am being stretched, and pulled, and it feels uncomfortable. I have been trying to hold onto things that are just different in this season of my life. I am not telling you to let go of the friendships just because they look different, but I am saying to not hold so tightly to the idea that they always have to look and be certain way. Sometimes you’re really close, and other times, there is some space within the friendship. This doesn’t mean the friendship is over, but it’s just in it’s next season. We can’t hold so tightly to our perspective on how our friendships should be. Sometimes God calls us into new relationships with different people, and we celebrate our time in those new relationships. If God has pulled you from a relationship, acknowledge that, and don’t try and hold onto something that wasn’t meant for you anymore. If he has called you apart, for only a season, then embrace the new season with open arms, instead of looking back on the old. You can’t have a renewed heart, if you are too focused on your past.
God is always growing us. He brings us new friendships, and new relationships and we change and adapt to the season. It’s tough. Sometimes the season of friendship changes and we weren’t ready for it. We want everything to be how it’s always been, and we don’t want to embrace the change in season. But when we do this, we are missing out on what God wants to do in our new season, and the people he wants to bring into our lives to make that season flourish. Growth means uncomfortability, change, and challenges. Embrace them with joy, knowing you are entering your new season. Each season comes with its own difficulties, but it also comes with new joys.
Is there a relationship or friendship in your life that has changed seasons? Maybe you feel distant from someone, and closer to someone else. Did you have to say goodbye to a friendship you weren’t ready to leave? That’s growth. Sometimes these changes in friendship aren’t permanent and other times they are. But look back on it. Thank God for all of the wonderful things that friendship or relationship brought you. That person changed your life, and you both grew together. If the friendship is better left behind, then embrace that change and look forward to the things God wants to do in your life. If that friendship is entering into a new season, then embrace that new season, instead of looking to the past. We don’t know when things are going to end, or when a friendship is going to change. So enjoy what you have, and who you have in this season. It won’t look like this forever. Seasons are beautiful, and allow us to experience different things. This is the same in friendships. Different relationships allow us to grow, and enjoy different times in our lives together. Love those you have now. Love the times you’ve had in your past, but embrace the season you’re in. Relationships change, because we change. I’m excited for my new season, as I still loved my last season. God is doing great things, as he will in your life as well. Embrace it, and enjoy your season of new relationships and friendships.